No vacation comes off without a disappointment or two.  Jeremy dropping his smart phone in the Pacific Ocean off the side of a boat on the Na Pali Coast can be considered a slight disappointment.  The GPS had been really handy up to that point, AND it was fun to be able to do the instant blog posts from the car.  Oh well.  It was insured and we’ve moved on.

Tunnels Beach on the north shore has been touted repeatedly as “snorkeler’s nirvana” and “turtle heaven.”  It was a ZOO.  We had to park and walk about a mile.  (California beach – no biggie.  Hawaii beach – HOT sands!)  I forgot my earplugs and had to walk back.  Then my underwater camera would not work (I loaded the battery wrong, but could not tell what the issue was at the time.)  And we never saw a single turtle!  Which is probably just as well or I would still be bitching about the no-camera issue.  All in all it turns out that the beach across from our condo is the best snorkeling we have found!

Hukilau Lanai was one of those places we found online and thought looked amazing.  We made reservations for last night at 7pm.  Unfortunately since we did not stay as long as planned at Tunnels Beach, we were passing through Kapaa much earlier than our planned reservation.  We stopped in and asked if we could be seated at 5 instead of 7pm.  The hostess said yes, but that we would have to eat indoor second tier, was that OK?  When I said I didn’t know what that meant she got snotty.  I assured her that indoor second tier was just fine and we were seated way in a back corner behind a row of tables that fronted the view over a garden patio on the ocean.  Seven of those tables were still open when we left, so we never did figure out why we were forced into a crappy seat when so many others were open.  The hostess got rude again when Jeremy mentioned it to her.

Now, I usually listen to the little voice in my head, and when we sat down it screamed at me to get up and walk out.  Damn!  I wish I had listened.  Nice waiter, crappy food.  OK, the Wally salad was really good and the lobster bisque was not bad.  But Jeremy ordered the special: Swordfish crusted in sesame seeds.  Looks awesome, right?  Not so much.

Wins award for least flavor on a plate this vacation.

I ordered the mixed grill that came with two kinds of fish and shrimp skewered on sugarcane.  Sounds yummy.  One of the fish was really good (the walu on the right) but the other fish was overcooked and the shrimp had no taste at all.  It also would have been nice if the waiter had mentioned the frequent gastric distress associated with the walu.

BUT – on the bright side, we discovered Keoki’s Paradise in Poipu!  On a scale of five-star dining, we give this one ten stars!  Everything here rocked.  Our waitress set the bar for wait staff – she was simply amazing and went above and beyond in every way.  I raved so about the cinnamon carrot muffins they served before dinner that she brought me four to take home with us assuring me they made a wonderful breakfast and she was right.  The only time in my life I ever left a 25% tip.  The atmosphere is absolute tropical paradise.  The food is the best we have had on our trip so far.  We started with Dinosaur Kale Salad.

I ordered the seafood risotto: Lobster, shrimp, scallop and fresh fish, shiitake mushrooms, on a chardonnay herb risotto.  Delicious!

Jeremy ordered the Chef’s Fresh Fish Duo: A combination of two Hawaiian fresh fish, ono and monchong (butterfish), one Misoyaki seared and the other herb grilled, with a citrus vinaigrette, Thai coconut jasmine rice, locally farmed vegetable.  Double yum.

Hula Pie was also magnificent and so BIG that we could not eat it all.

One other place to mention when speaking of awesome vacation food is the Koloa Fish Market where they serve plate lunches for less than $10 a plate. The ono in wasabi cream sauce was every bit as good as Keoki’s food and the portions were HUGE.  In fact, we’re off to Koloa Fish Market right now for a loco moco breakfast.

Life is good!